Who Would Have Thought?
by x-Kryst-x
Summary: It has been a year since Dimitri left. Rose has found comfort in a old friend but a new mysterious man at the Royal ball has her smitten. And what will happen when Dimitri returns. Will it be love again? My sumary sucks, you should just read the story :P
1. Another year and New Beginings?

**Who Would Have Thought?**

**Chapter 1**

**This is my first story so please review! Tell me what you think!**

**Thankyou to my amazing Beta: Nicia! You are a miracle worker!**

**Disclaimer: Unfotuantely I don't own Vampire Academy *sigh***

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><p>"Fuck this." I sighed and slumped down onto the couch. "I wish I could sit around in my house all day and just chill with a good old bottle of tequila to drown my worries away." I spoke from my position on the couch and smiled sweetly to the drunken fool who was currently clogging up my living room. As much as I loved Adrian, I was really getting annoyed that he just sat around and did jack shit all day.<p>

"Oi, I do not sit around with a good old bottle of tequila, my goodness Little Dhampir we all know that I prefer the hard gag like feel of straight vodka sliding down my throat." He smiled just as sweetly at me and sat down beside me before draping his arm round my shoulders.

I had really started to like hanging round with Adrian every evening. There was something about two fucked up people, sharing a glass of wine and some Chinese takeout whilst talking about how shit life is. Well, we don't really talk about that. I kind of like where my life is at the moment. I guess I'm where I wanted to be 3 years ago. All I wanted back during my St Vlad's days was to be Lissa's guardian and to be the best at my job. Now my life comes with extra perks. I basically have weekends off, I'm not out in the open every moment and I have a team of 8 amazing guardians who help me with my job. And I have my own place in the royal court and all the food and donuts I could eat. Lissa being Queen was great.

"So what type of takeout will it be tonight? You know I could go for Chinese or some pizza... I don't know I guess I'm kind of feeling, different, exotic. You know?" As I glanced at Adrian he had a smirk on his face.

"I actually have something planed for us tonight Rose. Something nice, something to take your mind off of stuff so you can spend some nice quality time with me, your drunken admirer."

"Maybe I would be more willing to go with you if you hadn't brought up why we would be going" I snapped and jumped from the couch to look at him. Now I didn't want to spend any time with him at all.

All day I had Lissa and Christian treading carefully and asking how I was. It had been a year since _it_ had happened, and even asking me how I was, still managed to bring up feelings I'd worked hard to keep hidden in a dark place where they couldn't be reached.

It had been a whole year since I had that falling out with him. He left... Actually left and hadn't returned.

He sends letters to Lissa, she tries to hide it but I got sucked into her head when she received the first letter. The joy of hearing from him pulled me straight in and she forgot to keep me out.

"_I have to go Adrian... I mean it. I can't stick around any longer." I stood up from the coffee table once again. It was hard to leave when he was so good at making me forget but I needed to get out of that crowed café. _

_I didn't want to be alone but at the same time that was all I wanted. My friends are good and comforting, but I have had hardly anytime time to myself to just cry and try to heal. I tried to smile and it probably came out looking like more of a grimace but it would have to do._

"_Okay Rose, bye." Adrian sighed and continued to sip his tea. I turned and grabbed my jacket off of the back of my seat and started to walk off._

"_See you" I said as I turned to look at him before I walked out of the store. I hurriedly crossed the distance between all the stores and over to the lake near the trees. I had notice he had started calling me Rose more. He was worried. The only other time he called me Rose, was when we were romantically involved. I had found a nice spot under the trees which was also out of sight of the park across the lake. I laid back against my jacket so that I could stare up into the star filled sky and finally cried._

_Feelings of joy radiated to me through the bond Lissa and I shared. _

_I was getting sick of all this joy shit she kept sending me. That's when I felt it, sadness. I jerked up and snapped into her head, only to see she was alright with her guardians around her. Until I saw what she was looking at... A letter._ _She ripped it open._

_My Dearest Lissa,_

_I cannot believe the feelings you must have had in this past week but I hope you understand why I left. I cannot be around her any longer. You know and understand how I feel. I feel horrible to be leaving you but I have no doubt there will be great guardians to look after you. Maybe one day I will return but for now I need to be by myself. I can't heal when she is always there. She's everywhere I look, and her presence is almost suffocating. She won't leave me alone and I just can't bear to be near her._

_Lissa, I cannot thank you enough for what you have done. You have been my salvation and have healed me from the worst possible fate. Not only have you given me life, but you have saved me from something I knew I wouldn't ever want to be. You have saved me and I will always be in debt to you._

_Dimitri Belikov._

_I snapped back into my head. _

_He would never understand how much I went through, to even suggest breaking Victor out of prison for information and trying to get Lissa to fill a stake with spirit. I can't believe that just because she stabbed him with the stake, she gets all the credit. And I live in the same place as him, so of course I'm going to be here. Asshole! And so what if I'm fucking jealous. It's not fair._

_I broke again but this time, my hysterics turned into screaming and raving. I cried and I cried until that son of a bitch Noah found me, carried me home and took care of me until I stopped crying._

"I just wanted to do something different. You just seem like you've had a hard day." He sighed as he glanced at me with those eyes he does when he is sorry - for lying out of his ass.

"That's bullshit and you know it Ivashkov!" I was pissed. I counted on him to be him, _not_ to be a pain in the ass like the rest of them.

"Well you're going to come whether you like it or not. I can't keep this person waiting too much longer while you have your tantrum, so go get changed and then we'll leave." He smiled and pushed me towards his bedroom.

-X-

Of course I did what he told me too. That doesn't necessarily mean that I liked doing it, but I'm a sucker for surprises, and I really wanted to know who he had brought to dinner tonight. I managed to keep my cursed mutterings under my breath.

We walked along the pavements of the Royal court. We walked arm in arm, which earned us plenty of stares and whispers from residents of Court. Screw them and what they thought. Adrian kept me sane with his insanity and that's what I needed.

"Quit staring and mind your business!" I said to those who were gawking at us.

"Little Dhampir, mind yourself. Keep your angry talk for the bedroom. You know how hot it gets me when you get rough. Don't make me take you over to those trees right now…" His tone of voice was sexy but serious. The Moroi walking past looked appalled and quickly hurried on. That's when I lost it and burst into laughter.

"Do me sideways! That was hilarious, Ivashkov!" I was holding my stomach, bent over and was laughing uncontrollably. Seconds later he was too. He pulled me along to the restaurant, and we stumbled along, hand in hand, laughing until we got there.

-X-

"So who is joining us tonight?" I asked as coyly as the waiter pulled back my chair for me to sit down.

"I'm not going to tell you, it's a surprise and I hope you don't kill me for it later tonight." He smiled at me nervously. It couldn't be who I think it is. He left seven months ago.

"Adrian, I'm going to ask you this once and once only. Who is it?" I snapped at him.

"Noah."

I stared blankly at him. I wanted to yell, but at the same time, I wanted to be happy. Noah, he was Noah. I'd thought he was going to be the one who could possibly make things better. But then his charge decided to leave court, and like a good guardian, he had to go with him. I threw a fit. A good old Rose fit. One of my best… but that didn't change a thing, and I knew it wouldn't.

I didn't need another person I cared for walking out of my life so I agreed to Skype with him. He didn't think that things would change too much, but after a couple of months I couldn't do it without him being here. He was busy being a big, bad guardian in the big, bad fucking world. I'm Rose Hathaway. I'm not meant to be weak, but I was, and I gave up on him being there. Noah being so far away just reminded me to much of Dim- him. I cringed inwardly, as the ache in my chest throbbed. Yeah that pain still hurt.

"Rose?"

A voice sounded behind me.

That voice, that silky voice. Damn Adrian to death. A rush of emotions came flooding back to me. It's the same thing that handsome bastard said to me the first time I actually met him.

"_Rose?"_

_Who was that? The voice was one I didn't know. Plenty of people knew my name, but I knew most of them. I didn't know this guy and he was ruining my pity and self-depression party, something that they would seriously have to suffer for later. _

_I stopped my sobbing and my hair pulling to look behind me. There was a man nervously looking at me._

"_What the hell do you want? And who the hell are you?" I said angrily, which hopefully implied that I was busy and they should hurry the fuck up._

"_Sorry I was- I was, walking through the trees and I heard you crying and I didn't think that you should be upset and that I would, ahh, come over and make you feel better so you wouldn't, you know… cry anymore"_

_I watched him with the meanest, pissed of look I had and listened to him stumble and stutter his words. It actually made me want to laugh. "You didn't answer my other question. Who the hell are you?"_

"_Oh, sorry. I'm Noah. I just got to court the other day. My charge is staying at court from now on and yeah. I'm Noah. Hi."_

"_I didn't ask for your life story." At this he smiled and came to sit by me. "That wasn't an open invitation to come sit down with me. As you mentioned you noticed I was wallowing in my self depression and I would really like to get back to that without being interrupted. Thanks."_

"_You shouldn't be so sad, you're young. I don't want to see you sad."_

"_Yeah well, I don't give a fuck what you want to see."_

"_Come here" He patted to his lap and opened his arms._

"_No. I don't know you and I don't need someone fucking up what time I have to myself, so you should make like a fat kid who just saw cake and piss off!"_

_Even though he smiled at that, his voice was soft with understanding._ "_Rose, it's okay to hurt."_

_With that one little phrase my pissed off mood evaporated, and I felt myself lose control of my hurt as the tears escaped from my eyes once again. I felt as strong arms encompassed me and my head rested against his hard chest as the tears flowed freely, staining my cheeks and his shirt. I cried while he rocked me and let me hurt and begin to heal. He just held me tight and made the world seem like a slightly happier place to be._

"Rose? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just got distracted for a minute." I took a deep breath. "Hey Noah."

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><p>Please tell me what you think!<p>

Krys xx


	2. A Little History Repeating?

**Chapter 2**

**Thank you Nicia for your beta work. You are my magical angel who makes my stories so much better.**

**Disclaimer: I dont own Vampire Academy =(**

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><p><em>His fingers trailed up my spine. His breath was on my neck. <em>

_Oh god, how I missed him. _

_He was teasing me. His lips made contact with mine and I moaned deeply. I felt my hair being pulled back from my neck and lips replace it._

_He rolled me onto my back and propped himself above me. His body was only millimetres from mine but I could feel his arousal against my stomach. I looked up, to stare into his eyes, but they were shut as a blissful expression covered his face. I moaned again as I ran my hands through his hair and down his back. His eyes were still shut as he expelled the breath he was holding onto._

_"Oh Roza," He leant down and nuzzled his head against my chest. "You smell so good." _

_That's when he finally looked up at me, and the sight that met my eyes caused me to scream. _

_He was gazing at me with bright red eyes._

I realised it was just a dream.

I felt as though I hadn't even slept, and the dream didn't help by making me feel even more drained and sluggish than waking at such an early hour did. With a sigh I made my way into the bathroom to shower and get ready. Turning on the hot water and stepping in I sighed in relief. The shower awoke me. Ha funny Rose, that's a great use of words on your part.

That's when the memory of last night hit me. Looking up into light blue eyes rimmed with long dark lashes. The familiarity made a small smile spread across my face. The short dark hair that was tousled and styled to look as if he had just got out of bed, and last of all those beautiful wide lips that secretly promised a good time.

He was wearing a white shirt. His legs were dressed in tight black jeans – sadly, covering up the sexy legs that I'd worked ever so hard to convince him he had. Mmm, yummy.

Surprisingly, I'd had a great time last night. I'd expected it to be forced and awkward… yet our night was casual and fun. The way it was before he left.

I think I needed that. I feel terrible for how I ended our friendship, and last night made me believe that even more. I'd always known that I needed to apologise, but he made me feel as if what had happened was in the past and forgotten, and so, at the time, it seemed like I didn't really have to.

I couldn't do that to him. I owed him an apology. I'm not weak little Rose who wallows in self-pity, I am the new and improved Rose.

After climbing out of the shower and getting into my guardian black and whites, I picked up my phone and headed out the door to Lissa's.

-X-

"So, tell me about your date last night." Lissa squealed at me as I walked through her front door.

"It wasn't a date Lissa. I didn't even know it was him who was going to be there. Nothing happened any-" That's when I saw Christian. "Oh God! Put your shirt on, please! As much as I love men, your pasty white chest does nothing for _me_ firebug." Christian was standing there with his hands on his hips. He only had on some track pants, but they were riding low on his hips and he had the biggest smirk on his face.

"You know you like what you see."

"Christian, go away. I have important things to discuss with Rose."

I laughed and poked my tongue out at him as Lissa intervened before we could get into another one of our legendary arguments. I could hear him muttering under his breath about not being loved.

"Rose! Stop acting like a child and tell me everything!" It was now Christian's turn to turn around and poke his tongue out at me while I dealt with his overly hyped girlfriend.

"Adrian took me to the restaurant and left, no thanks to you. And Noah and I talked and just caught up on life." I knew she was behind all of this all along. Spirit business my ass.

"I don't believe you. I know you're hiding stuff Rosemarie Hathaway. I want to know _everything_!" She had a mischievous glint in her eye. I could see the brain ticking over.

"Liss, I know what you're thinking. I am not going to get involved with anyone."

"You've had Adrian wrapped round your little finger for the past seven months, and you know you love him. If you won't be with him I was hoping you might start something back up with Noah. Rose, I just want to see you happy again."

"I am happy Liss. I was really excited to see him again. I'm glad he is back and I plan to have him as one of my closest friends."

She pouted at me. Waves of worry, hurt, confusion and eagerness came through the bond all at once. She was obviously worried about me. Hurt and confused about why I wouldn't tell her everything, and eagerness? Because she knows I'm going to tell her despite all of my protests. Stupid best friendship.

"Liss... I kissed him last night okay."

She jumped up and down and pumped her fist in the air happily. "I knew it!" She'd cracked me _and_ she was overly smug about it. I guess I really do have a bad influence on her.

"He was great. Smoking hot with a rocking body, and yes it felt great to be walked home and pushed up against my door. Are you happy now?"

"Very." She grabbed her jacket, kissed Christian on the cheek and walked out the door. "Rose, don't lag behind." Her smugness and superiority radiated playfully through the bond as we headed out to work.

-X-

Work was great. I loved my job. I was able to protect Lissa in a heavily guarded environment, and most of the time I was free to talk when I wanted and just spend days with her doing our normal thing.

The only time I had to shut up and stand in the corner was during important council meetings. Those days dragged. Although today I was surprised to be standing in a formal dress store.

I was bombarded with excitement. Liss was up to something and it was something I immediately knew I wasn't going to like.

"So… I heard Noah has a new guarding partner?" She really starting to seem suspicious as she flicked through the dresses on the rack.

"Yeah he does. He arrives tomorrow apparently is really tall and keeps to himself. They have been partners for about 4 months. According to Noah I would appreciate his body." I guess he knows I love men with muscles too.

"Did you know they are both coming to the ball tomorrow night?" Shit, I had forgotten about the ball. It was a ball for the amazing progress that has been made on the Moroi defensive training program.

It was masquerade ball that Lissa had coerced me into attending… not as a guardian, but as a quest. Kill me now. I guess the only upside is that no one would know I'm me.

"No, I didn't. Liss, I'm going to wear that black dress I have."

"You obviously didn't pay attention to the invitation. It can't be slick and smooth. It has to be a proper masquerade formal dress and that's what I got for you." She smiled and pushed me into the changing room.

The dress was beautiful. It was a dark green and went with my skin tone perfectly. As soon as I spied it hanging up on the wall I wanted to wear it to the ball. I wanted to turn heads. I wanted men at my feet, or possibly a certain man in particular. It made me think about last night.

_He pulled me out of the restaurant into the quiet night. He held my hand and it was comforting. He turned to look at me before he sighed and rested his head against mine. That's when his arms wrapped round my body._

"_You're just as beautiful as the day I left. I haven't stopped thinking about our last night together."_

_I returned his embrace. It was a good night. Before he left he wanted me in so many ways, but he never pushed me. He let me be Rose and do what I wanted, because he respected me and my choices. I was selfish back then. I used him to make me better about myself and I gave him nothing in return._

_He made me feel alive. I needed his affection and he gave it to me. _That_ night I gave him mine. My body started to flush with heat at the memory and I blushed and looked up at him. _

"_I think I still need you." I don't know why I said it._

"_I think I need you too." We didn't say anything else, only stared into each other's eyes for a few more minutes before he walked me back to my door. The next thing I knew I was pushed up against my door with his lips on my neck. _

_The smell of him was intoxicating. I wanted him. I needed him. He was the one I last released myself to, and I so badly wanted to take him inside and have my way with him._

_His lips found mine and his tongue slid across my bottom lip, making a moan escape from my throat. If he didn't stop I wasn't going to be able to control myself._

_The last time I couldn't control myself Dimitri left. _

_I had to think about it even though I shouldn't have been thinking about him. We hadn't been romantic since God knows when, and the stupid ass left after we had a blow-out. He was a jerk. I had given up hope that he would come back and that I would ever have a future with him._

_And now I have this amazingly delicious guy biting at my lip, and I was thinking about a coward who _usedto_ mean something to me._

_Noah pulled away from my lips. "I think we should leave it there Rosemarie." He would always use my full name. And he was the only one I would allow to. "I will catch up with you tomorrow. Go inside, lock your door and I will leave."_

"_Goodnight." I quickly pecked him on the cheek, went inside and locked the door before I collapsed on my bed. Then I heard him leave. The only things that made a sound were his shoes tapping against the ground as he walked away._

"Rose? Are you okay? Do you need help?" I snapped back to reality. Lissa sounded frantic.

"I'm great; I'll be out in a moment." I quickly slipped on the dark green dress.

It was beautiful on me. It had a body hugging top, with a low cleavage line but was still classy. At the waist the chiffon skirt flowed out effortlessly to graze the space around my feet. The stunning detail to the top part of the dress blew me away.

As I looked at my reflection in the mirror I smiled.

I looked better than I had a few months ago. The dark circles under my eyes had gone - mostly because my nightmares weren't as frequent. Adrian also found himself in my dreams more. I'd rather be bugged non-stop by him in my dreams than by the nightmares I was having.

My skin was darker and more toned because I started spending more time in the sun. My hair was also very long now. It reached my waist and was curlier than it had ever been. Although, at times, I had the urge to cut my hair. I wanted a bit of a change.

My body was still curvy but my stomach was flatter and my muscles were _a lot _more toned. I looked pretty good. I could hear Lissa's foot tapping and quickly returned to the front of the store.

"Wow. I am so good." She looked happy at her work, but her face softened. "You look so beautiful Rose."

-X-

Lissa wouldn't let me see her dress until tomorrow night. I wasn't going to complain though our next stop was the beauty salon.

As Lissa went to get her nails and feet done I went to the hairdresser. My hair was long and needed a trim, and I wanted a bit of a change. I was thinking blonde but I think we all know blonde wouldn't be my colour.

I sat in the chair and the stylist worked my hair back to life. A conditioning treatment and massage were exactly what I needed to relax and enjoy what the day had to come.

My stylist cut and trimmed away, and by the end I thought I looked refreshed. I love these pamper days Lissa has to have every couple of weeks.

Being a Dhampir makes looking good hard. I do have to say I think I'm not too shabby in the looks department and can pull off going with no make-up. Well, that's what I like to think.

"Hey Rose!" I looked over to see Ambrose waving at me.

"Hey good looking! How have you been?" Ambrose is a dhampir who didn't become a guardian. I met him on one of my very first trips to court. He was gorgeous and has always been a good friend.

"I've been great. I was looking for you. My aunt says she wants to see you about some upcoming matters." Now I have always been hesitant about his aunt, but her predictions have seemed to always come true. She was the one who predicted Dimitri's awakening.

After another guardian arrived to take over I said my goodbyes to Lissa, and made my way down to Rhonda's. I knocked lightly before I walked into the dim candle lit room.

She hasn't changed one bit since I was last here.

"Alright you old hag, what do you have for me this time?" I sat down on the cushions across from her.

Her face held a mix of emotions. The same look she'd had when she told Dimitri he would lose what he most loved.

Oh shit, what am I in for now?

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><p><strong>I wonder what she is going to tell Rose?<strong>

**I hopefully well get my 3rd chapter to my beta later on tonight. Aus Time cause its early morning here =)**

**Please Review, and dont be afraid to tell me how you think it should =)**


	3. Realisations and Regrets

**Chapter 3**

**Yay Chapter 3!**

**Nicia I could not do this without you. When I struggle with what I want to say. You come out and BAM! It's amazing!**

**In Celebration of my third chapter and the release of Bloodlines, I made Black Bread! It's delicious! Recipe will go up on my Profile =)**

**Disclaimer: Vampire Academy isn't owned by me… I'll keep dreaming though.**

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><p><strong>Dimitri POV.<strong>

I was dreading the fact I had to go back to court. It had now been a year since I left. I'd taken the time away to become the man I needed to be again. What I did to the people I loved could never be forgotten, but hopefully forgiven. I hoped that Lissa could forgive me for walking out on her.

When I think back on how I walked away from protecting the last Dragomir Princess I realised that I had walked away and disregarded the one thing I've been taught all my life. _They come first_. I had earned my position back as a respectable guardian, but left to pursue other interests.

After placing the last of my folded clothes in my suitcase I zipped it up and padlocked it. The past month had been great. After my charge was killed while I was off duty, I was able to go home and visit my family.

Viktoria finished school while I was visiting. I was able to see her pass her trials and graduate. She is now working for a royal moroi in the area and I was so proud of her.

My mother was happy to see me back, she hasn't stopped fussing over me, and I think it's starting to get to my sisters.

However, Yeva has hardly spoken to me. I hear her muttering every time I walk past. She calls me an idiot and selfish. I have explained to her repeatedly that it was Lissa who saved me. _Not_ _Rose_. Yet she continues to argue her point, and so now I'm hardly speaking to her either.

When I returned my family couldn't believe their eyes. I had left it so long before I finally worked up the courage to go back home. I was at court for 3 months before I came back to my family – only to have them scream and cower in the corner of the front room. It was irritating because obviously Rose hadn't called to tell them. But then again, why would she? They thought I was still strigoi and my heart broke a little. I would never harm them. I thought about Rose again but this time my face scrunched up in pain. Yeva came out of the kitchen to see what all of the fuss was about, and walked straight up to me despite the rest of my family protesting and yelling that I would kill her. She stood in front of me, my tiny grandmother who was half my size, and called me stupid for leaving Rose before she slapped me in my head.

She turned back to the family and told them to stop with the hysterics.

It was like that was the confirmation my family needed to accept the fact that I was really a dhampir again. They embraced me and cried with me. They were happy to have their son back and I was happy to have my family back.

That was the day I really started to heal.

After a couple of moths living back at home I was ready to work again, and had gone off to protect my new charge here in Russia.

It didn't seem like a year had passed.

_Rose._

My mind would always wander back to her. I would wonder what she would be doing, and who she might be talking to. Then I would wonder if it was a guy - and because of that, I'd want to know if she had gone back to Adrian. Then I would want to hit the wall. The day I left was the same day that she'd come to me to let me know that she had broken it off with Adrian. That she was opening herself up for hurt. She said she wanted me to know that I was the one.

I called her a fool.

Now, after learning to live again, I don't think I could look her in the eyes. She thinks I left because she couldn't give me what I wanted in life. My Roza was everything I wanted and more. How could I face her when all I have been is a disgusting monster?

Gahh! I can't think of her. She was not what I needed any longer, and I can't keep thinking with as though I still have a hold over her.

She was not part of my life anymore!

I will not let myself think of her. I will never be able to be what she wants. Not with her. Not with anybody.

"Uncle Dimka?" Paul's voice snapped me out of my head. I looked over at him and smiled as I tried to hide the pain from my face.

"Yes Paul?"

"Grandma wants to see you in the kitchen before you go." He walked out of my bedroom and into his. I walked down stairs to see what my grandmother wanted.

The house seemed strangely quiet. Yeva wasn't in her chair and my sisters weren't in sight. I braced myself for the worst as I walked into the kitchen.

oOoOoOoOo

When I walked into the kitchen I was shocked to see my mother siting on one side of the table looking very displeased. Yeva was to her left with a smirk on her face, and Viktoria was sitting on the other side of the table, looking sad with tears in her eyes.

There was a chair in front of me that sat directly across from them. It looked like an interrogation session was about to go down and I had absolutely no idea why.

"Mum, what's wrong? What is with the whole interrogation vibe I'm getting here?" I looked at Viktoria. "Vik, you're upset, why?"

My mother pulled out something from her pocket, but hid it from my line of sight. Whatever it was it fitted in the palm of her hand. She slid it to the middle of the table and then she moved her hand back so I could see it.

I gasped. It was my small picture of Roza and I. It was the only picture I had of both of us together. It was taken by her on our trip to see my old mentor and the man who would have been taking her novice interview.

On our way we had stopped at a service station to fill up the tank and get food for Rose. I walked out to find her standing in the snow looking out over the mountains. She persuaded me to make snow angels with her, and while we were laid down she snuggled over to me, laid her head on my chest, said 'smile Comrade' in her cheeky way, and snapped a photo before I could object.

I could smell her and the feel of lithe, little body beside mine, with the light weight of her head on my chest made it feel as if we were lovers. At the time, it was a desire to have her in my arms. One I didn't act on often. I wish I could go back and give her all the love I could while I still had it, but now it will never happen.

"Would you like to explain why I found this picture in your pants pocket when I was doing the laundry yesterday?"

"_This_ is over a photo? It's just a photo mum" I knew this was bad and tried to bluff my way out if it.

"Well, would you like to explain why you have it at all? When you returned and we asked you about our Roza you said we were to never speak of her again, and to not speak to her again. Did you know how much Roza meant to me? She was like another daughter to me Dimitri! She came here, while you were one of those creatures, and did the hardest thing she'd probably ever have to do. She told us what happened, and then she tried to free your soul, to follow your wishes. Yet we did it, we cut all contact, because that's what you wanted. Because you said you will never be with her and wouldn't ever want to be. Yet you carry her photo in your pocket!"

My mother was yelling at me. Actually yelling at me. This is something I had never witnessed before in my life. As a child she would use forceful tones but never raised her voice.

"She is not _our_ Roza. She is _my_ Roza." I snapped back at my mother. So much for bluffing my way out of it.

"That's where you are wrong son. She is my _daughter_. She came to us, protected and loved us. She gave her heart to us in a time of need, and we gave her ours. She never once gave up on you and she became part of the family. After your death we could see in her eyes the love she had for you. We took her in as our daughter in law and loved her as our own. She is _our_ Roza too."

Viktoria looked at me with sad, mournful eyes.

"You told me I could never see her again. She was the closest friend I had and you took her away. We all did what was best and now I'll never see her again. I feel betrayed, because you never let go and we had to make ourselves let go for you, and you don't even appreciate what we have given up."

She had no idea how much I appreciated them. But then again, she didn't know how much I lost.

"You have no idea what it's like to be me." I screamed across the table. "You don't know what I had to give up! I gave up my life, I gave up family and I gave up my love! I was happy to have my life and family back but I will never have my love back! I'm sorry I don't want you reminding me of the time I was a monster, and that the woman I loved healed you of your pain. I had to come back to a life where I was good, but had to deal with what I had done to people. That includes Roza. You will never know what I did to Rose and I cannot bear to be anywhere near her when I know what I did to her."

"You are such a stupid boy" Yeva commented like she hardly cared. I glared at her and gestured for her to continue. I wanted her to get it all out in the open so she could get over her stupid grudge. "Roza's love was unyielding. When you came back, she had a reason to live again. She is a warrior who fought for what was best. She fought for you but all you have done is disregard and disrespect her. You say Princess Dragomir saved you. All she did was fill a stake with spirit and revive you. Who told her that could be done? Who found out that it could be done? Who went across the country and helped _criminals_ escape from prison to go on a slither of a lead that could have been a dead end? You owe Rose for the love she had for you. Because if _she_ didn't, you would still a monster lurking in the night!"

I looked at her in complete and utter bewilderment. No matter how many times I was told by either her or Lissa, I couldn't believe that it was all Rose. I didn't think about the logistics behind it. I never thought about Rose.

I was so caught up in thinking I had done her wrong during my time as a strigoi and that I didn't deserve to be near her. I'd convinced myself that she wouldn't want me there.

I never listened, when all along I could have been home with her. She could have been in my arms right now.

But I had given it up because I'd thought I had to get over her so that she could be truly happy. But she needed me to be happy.

_What have I done? _

I looked up at my sister, my mother and my grandmother and met each of their eyes before I spoke. "If you want to contact her or visit her, it's not my job to stop you." Viki smiled at me as my mother stood, walked round the table to me and placed the photo over my heart before she pulled me into one of familiar comforting hugs. I buried my face in her hair as she whispered her thanks and love to me before she kissed my forehead and released me from her hold.

I looked towards Yeva and sat down opposite her. She had always been right with her predictions and visions, from before I was even born, and I had doubted her.

"I'm sorry, Babushka" I dropped my head in my hands and let the tears falls from my eyes. The realisation of losing Roza washed over me. I was too far away to apologise, and had been gone for too long.

Now I will never be able to be with her.

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><p><strong>I know I'm absolutely horrible for leaving Rose where she was but this flowed from my head and what would a Vampire Academy fan fiction be without Dimitri right?<strong>

**I'm so excited about the upcoming chapters! I have heaps planned.**

**Please review so I can keep writing =)**

**Okay so i have my Year 12 Big Testy thing that decides whether or not i can go to uni coming up and i have work tomorrow morning. When i get home tomorrow im going to spend all night on chapter 4 and will make up for it by writing up a really long chapter! And the ball seen when Rose gets a little flirtations with this hot new guy... maybe ;P**


	4. That Night

**Chapter 4**

**Okay a big Sorry to everyone. I know it took me a couple of days to update this time. My big exam is tomorrow and because you cant study for it i will be writing tonight to get the next chapter to my beta!**

**(okay so sorry to those who have read this chapter before i added this note. I was unable to get home to finish the next chapter =( I needed a major De-stress so we went out. I have another round of the tests tomorrow. They really suck because the go for two days all day! This will control my future =( At least we get a free breaky. So when im done with the test tomorrow arvo i will come home and get it to my Beta.)**

**So i was originally going to write the Ball Scene but i started writing and i got this. So hopefully this will give you some insight into what happened "That Night" 1 year ago.**

**Im pretty sure the ball scene will be next chapter!**

**My Amazing Beta Nicia is still doing a Fam Bam job of making my stories so good. You should go and read hers! They will rock your world! =D**

**Disclaimer: Vampire Academy is not mine and will unfortunately never be mine.**

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><p><em>"Alright you old hag, what do you have for me this time?" I sat down on the cushions across from her.<em>

_Her face held a mix of emotions. The same look she'd had when she told Dimitri he would lose what he most loved._

_Oh shit, what am I in for now?_

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><p>"I don't know how to say this to you Rose." She looked up at me, concern evident in her eyes.<p>

"You really aren't shitting me are you?" I was dreading this. This was going to mess up my life. Screw this. Why does everything that could ever go wrong happen to me?

"I have mixed messages for you today."

"Well you better replay them for me now." I had always been sceptical about this psychic mumbo jumbo, but I have to say she hasn't gotten anything wrong in the past. I'm actually willing to believe what she says, but like hell I'm going to let her know that. "Oh, you can delete the cryptic shit and get straight to the real messages. Thanks."

"Sorry Rose. I can't give you the answers. It's for you to figure out." I pursed my lips and stared, waiting for her to continue and tell me the newest cryptic message life had waiting for me. "When love is lost, love is found and lost and found again. Things will get better and worse but for whom?" She looked towards me expectantly.

I hope she wasn't expecting a thank you 'cause to me the whole set-up seemed like complete bullshit.

"What the fuck does that mean? What are you trying to say there? You know what? Don't tell me cause you're obviously pulling my leg and arm and whatever else you can hold on to!"

"Wear your hair short for the ball tomorrow night. You will thank me in the future." Her final message followed me as I stormed out of her room, kicking the pillows as I left and slamming the door behind me. Ambrose was sitting outside and he stood up as I approached.

"Rhonda is so full of it. Sorry sexy boy but I am not going to listen to anything she tells me anymore. She has gone cuckoo!" I swirled my finger in a circular motion round my head to emphasise my words.

"Rose you should really list-"

"Alright, I'm going to cut you off there. So thanks anyway, Ambrose, but I have somewhere to be."

I left the spa building, and let Lissa finish off her pampering session without me.

-X-

Walking around court aimlessly was not something I did on a regular basis. Although today could be an exception. The morning had actually started out relatively reasonably.

The same thing kept playing in my mind. _Love being lost and found_.

Love lost. Dimitri was a love I lost. But then again, so was Noah. Kind of. Love found? The words just tangled in my head.

What does this shit even mean? I know I let Rhonda believe I thought it was just shit, but I can't get it out of my head.

Her 'prediction' was really starting to bother me. Things will get better and worse for whom? Is she even talking about me now? Everything for _me_ just gets worse and never better. I just can't help but feel she is doing this for shits and giggles, but then again, it's Rhonda, and she has always been serious when it comes down to her craft.

I walked towards the gym. The one place that I can run and be whoever I want to be or do what I want to do. I walked to the bathrooms to change and returned outside to the track. It was a nice afternoon to run. I stretched my legs out and then my arms and then I ran.

Running always cleared my head and helped me to sort out any issues I was having. Rhonda had seriously done my head in, and it all ended up leaving me confused and with a terrible headache.

The wind in my face and the ache of my muscles helped me relax and get into that familiar rhythm.

I had started running when I was sent back to St Vladimir's in my novice year. Dimitri was the one who taught me how to run, and more importantly, why. So that, as a last resort, I can run fast enough to get away from the strigoi and save Lissa. _They come first_. Dimitri had loaded me full of common sense while he was my mentor. I thought running away from our problems would save us and protect Lissa. Sure I thought I had done a good job, but it didn't solve our problems. Running away was not an option.

_Although it was an option for Dimitri._

A little voice in the back of my head piped up with that realisation. Dimitri _did_ run away. He was a Russian God who I looked up to and thought would always face up to his problems. I didn't see how I throwing myself on the ground and saying that I was his would have been a problem but it was.

_Love fades and his did._

He was the only one who understood me in every way. He was my one weakness, and I let him see me at my strongest and weakest moments.

I got down on my knees and begged for him to stay.

He left anyway.

_I left Adrian's with tears in my eyes. I wiped my eyes with the back of my arm. Adrian will understand eventually. He understood when I left Vladimir's, and he will learn to understand now. It pained me to do that to him. I never wanted to hurt or leave him. I never even imagined in my wildest dreams that we could actually save Dimitri. I never knew that Adrian could care so much about me and I him. But I didn't love him enough. I was doing this for him._

_No I wasn't, I was doing this for me. _

_This time, leaving him was for selfish reasons. He shouldn't be with me any way. I just hurt him repeatedly, and couldn't give him what he needed from a relationship. I needed to leave and I needed to go back to where I _knew_ I was home. I can't stay and see his tears. I know I will always feel guilty for leaving him there, but there was nothing that could hold me back._

_So, I ran and I ran. I ran all the way to Dimitri's apartment. I stood there and wiped my eyes again before I looked towards the door expectantly and knocked. _

"_Who is it?" I heard the mumbled reply from the other side of the door._

"_Its… ummm.. Its Rose and I-I-I "A sob wracked through my body and the door was thrown open almost immediately. I glanced up through my tears into big brown worried eyes. The ones I have seen so many times in real life, and then, when I wasn't with him, in my dreams. I let the tears fall freely from my eyes at the sight of them as another sob tore through my chest. His arms encompassed me and I let myself fall into the feel of him._

"_Roza, shhh. Roza its okay. Just breathe." His large, calloused hands rubbed my back soothingly. "Tell me what's wrong. Is it Vasilisa?" _

_He was worried for Lissa._

_Not me. _

_Jealousy surged through my body and sobs wracked me as I pushed him away. _

"_Everything is always about Lissa. Not once have you asked if it was me. What about me Dimitri?" My tears had turned to ones of anger as my feelings spiked, until I was screaming at him. _

_I turned tail and started to run, trying to put as much distance between us as possible so that I didn't turn around and run back into his arms, just so he could reject me in favour of Lissa once again._

"_Rose, stop." Dimitri had caught up to me; just like he had back at St. Vladimir's whenever he ran my laps with me. When I ignored him he grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me back towards him. "Rose!"_

_I turned and slammed my hands against his chest "Fuck off! You don't care. You never have."_

"_You can't say that Rose! You know I care." He looked pained, probably from having to be in my presence, despite his words._

"_If you cared for me, once you were changed back you would have walked back into my arms and loved me like you did before. Obviously you never cared, not if you don't love me now. You said I was the one and yet you throw it back in my face. Do you know what you have done to me by draping yourself all over my best friend! It Hurts! IM HURTING AND YOU STILL ONLY CARE ABOUT HER! Never me. Never me."_ My yelling trailed off into broken whispers as _I slid down the apartment building wall, crying and repeating myself. _

_I was broken. I needed him and he was never here for me anymore. But regardless of everything he'd done, all I wanted, all I needed, was him. I looked up towards him. He was staring at me with hurt filled eyes._

"_Take a fucking picture, it'll last longer, and if you can't even be fucked to do that then fuck off and leave me alone cause I don't really need you staring at me like I'm some freak you can't believe you ever had feelings for!"_

"_Roza, no. Don't say that. You know I cared about you."_

"_It's funny how you used the past tense there, _Comrade_. By the way, Lissa is taken, so why don't you find someone who's not my best friend to go and worship?" _

"_Rose. I don't feel like that about Lissa!" He slumped down against the wall opposite me. I wanted to lie on the floor and scream and pull my hair out._

"_You know, I broke up with Adrian so that I could tell you how much I love you and that you're the only one I want. But you can't even find it in you to give a shit about me. You didn't ever care. You're meant to be the one who holds me and sing to me in Russian and make it all better when I feel like I can't cope. After everything we have been through… I thought this would make us stronger. I didn't think it would have the opposite effect by making you fuck off and act like you never knew me."_

_His face scrunched up with frustration and he let out a long deep breath. Tears pricked at my eyes once again._

"_I don't love you Rose. Love fades and mine has." He took a deep breath and exhaled. My jaw dropped as hurt wrenched through my chest, before settling in my heart. _

"_I wish I had never saved you." I said it quietly and looked down._

"_You didn't save me. Lissa did."_

"_Who the fuck do you think told her to fucking save you, asshole?"_

"_Settle down, Rose."_

"_I really wished I hadn't saved you." With shaking knees I managed to push myself up off of the floor to walk away from the man I loved. _

"_Yeah, well maybe you shouldn't have! I wouldn't have to deal with your psycho bullshit!" he yelled to my slowly retreating figure. My anger spiked at his words, and as my control snapped I spun on my heel and surged towards him, my fist landing square in his jaw. My other hand swung round to connect with his nose. I looked up into his eyes. This would be the last time he hurt me like this. _

"_Maybe I shouldn't have. I liked you better as a strigoi than I do now. The strigoi you actually cared for me and loved me. _You_ are the real monster right now, and I truly do regret bringing you back your soul. Wait, hang on. You had more of a soul when you were a strigoi! So fuck you and fuck these mind games you're playing, because at least you were more straightforward three months ago!"_

"_I can't do this. I'm leaving you shit behind rose! I'm done with your constant attacks. So, goodbye forever. If you hate me so much, you'll be glad to see me gone."_

_My heart shattered inside. _

"_NO!"_

"_Sorry you don't have a say. Stay away from me!" He stormed towards his apartment and slammed the door shut. I threw my weight against the door, causing it to smash open, revealing Dimitri sat on his bed with his head in his hands. He looked up and he had tears in his eyes. I ran and fell at his feet._

"_Don't cry, please. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Don't leave! Don't leave, please." I pulled his head up to face mine and looked him in the eyes._

"_Just let me see a part of you I know. Please." I needed to see that the person I first met and fell in love with could still be there, could still love me. _

_He grabbed me and threw me onto the bed before he laid over me, his body pressed against mine. The hurt and sadness in his face mirrored my own._

"_I can't be what you want! I can't do this anymore." He pulled away sharply and moved towards his chest of drawers to start packing his clothes. I ran towards him and he pushed me away. He filled up his bag, stopping me every time I tried to stop him. _

_I was at my worst and I let him see me weak. Why couldn't he just love me? _

_Our love _can't_ fade._

_I fell to the floor and clutched at him, wrapping my arms and legs around his leg as he moved around the room dragging me with him. I cried against him and I screamed. I was banging my head against his leg as I saw him finish packing. I didn't know if it was a build-up of spirit darkness making me act like this, or simply, pure desperation._

_I wanted this pain to go away. I banged my head harder as he tried to pry me off. _

_I looked up at him, the heartbreak plain to see in my eyes. Snot and wetness covered my face._

"_Roza, please stop." He cried out._

"_Please don't leave me. Please." I choked out. I tightened my grip. He left his room and headed towards the gates used to enter and exit court, pulling his suitcase along with me still attached to his leg. All I could do was scream for him to stay. I could feel the blatant stares as people watched as I was dragged along the ground. All I could think about was Dimitri leaving and never coming back,_

"_I never meant what I said! Please just don't go! Don't. Go." _

"_Rose! Dimitri! What is going on?" I heard Lissa coming up behind us. A crowd had grown, and I was showing them how I weak I was._

"_Go away! This is _YOUR_ entire fault Lissa! Just leave me alone! Dimitri, please. I love you."_

_We had nearly reached the gates. He dumped his suitcase and roughly pulled me from his leg and up his body as I struggled to hold on. He crushed me against him and for a brief few seconds I felt him breathe in against my neck and softly kiss up to my ear. Then my reprieve was over and he pushed me out of arms reach so that he could grab his suitcase and walk the last few steps to the gate._

_I was stunned into silence. Maybe he _did_ care. _

_I ran after him as he was about to walk out of court forever._

_Guardians swarmed for me as I reached him._

"_Let me go! NO! Let me go! Dimitri! NO! Please, just stay." I fought against the grip the guardians had on me. _

_My eyes met Dimitri's chocolate brown ones, as he turned away from me. _

_It was over. The end - just like that. I wrenched my body out of the hold the guardians had over me and ran to the gate, to reach for him before he could go. But the gate was closed, and Dimitri was too far away for me to touch._

_I slid down the bars, screaming for him as Dimitri walked out of my life forever._

I came back to myself and I was still running. I realised I had run from one side of court to the other, and someone was pursuing me. I turned, to find it was Noah.

"Wait up will you! I've been calling your name for ages and followed you all over court! What's up jitterbug?" My face contorted with pain as I changed direction and ran into his open arms.

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><p><strong>So yeah, thats what happened.<strong>

**Tell me what you think? **

**Ohhh and something people might hate me for is coming up in the next couple of Chapters... What could it be? **

**rate and review please! xxxxxx**


	5. Happy Day

**Chapter Five**

**My goodness I know it has been FOREVER. Im so sorry. But this chapter is nearly twice as long =) **

**Never fear... I only have block exams this week so im at most of the schooling week to write! YAY!**

**My Beta Nicia, you are amazing. It was definately worth the small wait to get this back! You rock!**

**Please Review, I really want to know how im going... ill take bad as constructive critisism =)**

**Disclaimer: I still dont own Vampire Academy =( **

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><p>"Wait up will you! I've been calling your name for ages and followed you all over court! What's up jitterbug?" My face contorted with pain as I changed direction and ran into his open arms.<p>

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><p>After I stopped crying Noah continued to hold me until I'd calmed down completely so that he could lead me home.<p>

Once we reached my apartment door I pulled Noah towards me. One of my hands left its place on his shirt and slid up his shoulder to caress the back of his neck and pull his head towards mine. His lips encompassed mine gently before our movements became more urgent. His body crushed mine to the wall, his tongue slipping through my lips as I kissed him back eagerly and moaned deeply with satisfaction. I _needed_ his body against mine.

After a little fumbling with the lock behind my back I pushed the door open and pulled him in with me. My hands grabbed the bottom of his shirt and pulled it up over his head before we even reached the stairs. His chest amazed me, it was firm and toned and muscled and damn well drool worthy. He was a god all on his own. I ran my fingers lazily down his chest before I smiled and looked up into his deep blue eyes.

He ran his fingers along my jaw and I leaned into him to place hot kisses against his chest. A slight pant escaped his lips as I ran my hands down his sides and over the front of his pants. I could feel him hardening against my fingers and decided to give him a little shock. I smiled seductively as I let my hand slide down the front of his pants to firmly grasp his hardened member and slowly stroke along the length of his erection. He threw his head back and moaned, a deep sound of appreciation which only served to increase my own urges. I let my mouth trail kisses up his arm as he wrapped me in his embrace, making me laugh as he carried me to my room and placed me lightly on my bed.

He took his time with me and I took my time with him. With long, lingering kisses grazing my body he slowly pulled every piece of clothing off of me, the heat from his mouth arousing me further. I shivered at the feeling. I placed my lips against his neck and gave him a gentle bit before I ran my tongue along the sensitive skin there.

I was concerned that he might get the wrong idea. I was still in no way ready for anything more than just friends. Well friends with a few little benefits. I pulled his head up to meet my gaze.

"Noah, wait. You know this is just- just-." I stopped trying to figure out how to soften the blow of what I wanted to say and said it straight. "This won't mean anything you know. I don't want to keep going if you think this is anything more than some fun."

His expression was unfazed as he looked at me and leaned down to place a gentle but urgent kiss on my lips.

"Oh, Rosemarie, I know you. I know what you want, but if you want to show me any affection I will take whatever you are willing to give."

I felt bad, knowing it was nothing more than a bit of fun for me. But he made it feel so guiltless and simple that I didn't want to stop.

He leaned over me and my hands greedily ripped at his clothes until he was naked and hovering above me. "So beautiful." I heard him whisper as his eyes bored a trail down my body. Heat radiated through me as he slid down my body and pushed my legs slightly further apart so he could lie between them and enter me gently.

Sex with Noah was a beautiful act. Even though we were only friends, in that moment, we felt so intimate, so connected, that I found myself wanting more. Our movements were synchronised and in time as he moved in me, our hips rocking together as we drove each other closer to our release.

I arched my back in content as I felt him pleasure me and moaned deeply, Noah's voice echoing my own as he rested his forehead against mine before he kissed me gently. I felt every movement he made against me and my desire grew to unexpected heights. I could feel him smiling against my lips as my breath quickened as the intensity of my pleasure grew to extreme heights. As I climaxed my walls clenched around his , pushing him over the edge as we slumped back down to the bed.

It was an amazing night. I hadn't felt so alive in so long. Our sex was urgent and passionate, forceful but soft. He pleasured me in ways I had only felt once before. After we had finished I sighed as I laid my head against his chest. His arms circled me.

It felt nice to be in Noah's arms. It felt like my old home before he left. Sleeping in his arms was a nightly ritual for us before he left. It made me feel safe. He never wanted anything but to make sure I was happy. With him right now I was happy. I fell asleep to his fingers running through my hair.

-X-

I woke up the next morning to find myself alone in my bed. It was kind of disappointing that Noah hadn't stayed the night, but he knew me well enough to know I would feel like we were in a relationship if I woke in his arms. His new guarding partner was also arriving at Court today, so I couldn't expect him to stay when his partner needed a helping hand around court.

He was always so perceptive to my needs, and that point was proved when I glanced over at my bedside table to see a chocolate donut, a chocolate brownie and a large chocolate frappe waiting for me.

Nothing like chocolate in the morning to make the day seem like it was going to be amazing.

I scarfed the donut and brownie down before I scrambled out of bed and hit the shower. I was sore this morning. My legs were a little stiff, but I felt relaxed. Light. Carefree. I hummed as I let the hot water wash away the sticky sweat feeling from last night. I was really happy. I feel like everything I was holding on to had just been washed away from me. I felt like I didn't have any darkness problems. I actually wanted to smile and laugh. Lissa popping into my head startled me out of my thoughts and all traces of laughing disappeared.

_Rose you are running late this morning. I don't know where you went yesterday afternoon but you promised that you would work on spirit with Adrian and I, and we are waiting!_

Lissa wasn't grumpy when we she sent her little message through the bond. She was just concerned as to whether something had happened. Little did she know, I thought to myself. I quickly got out of the shower and got dressed. It was my day off today so I could wear whatever I wanted. I chucked on some back jeans and a blue tank top before I grabbed my chocolate frappe and headed towards Lissa's.

I knocked on the door and stood there sucking on my straw. Adrian opened the door and greeted me with a big smile.

"Well, look who we have here! My Little Dhampir, how nice of you to turn up." I smiled at him and gave him a huge hug. His eyes nearly popped out of his head and I laughed.

"Oh Adrian, I've missed you these last couple of days. I'm sorry I haven't been over." I continued as I walked into Lissa's apartment. He didn't say anything further, so I'm guessing Adrian was still shocked from my sudden burst of affection, but I was happy this morning and in truth I _had_ missed him. He was my best friend besides Lissa, of course, and I was happy I got to spend the day with both of them.

Walking into the lounge I saw Christian hugging Lissa over the back of the chair. I walked up to him and pulled him to me, a wicked grin on my face. "Good morning, Christian! How did you sleep last night?"

"Ahh Rose. Are you going to let go of me now?" I could hear Lissa giggling at us but I didn't care.

"Shhh, Christian, let us have this bonding time." I messed up his hair before I pulled away from him and grabbed Lissa into my arms to squeeze her tightly. From over her shoulder I could see the two boys staring at me in shock.

I released Lissa and fell back into the couch.

"So what are we working on today?"

Lissa laughed at me before she spoke.

"You had sex last night!" She giggled harder and I saw Adrian frown.

"What, I couldn't just be in a happy mood?" My voice was filled with mock outrage, but I knew Lissa wouldn't take it seriously. Adrian came to sit beside me and wrapped his arm round my shoulder.

"I'm seriously shocked. I don't think we have ever hugged. Wow… Maybe I could get to like this Rose." Christian voice was still shocked. It was funny to see him walking around dazed like this. I should be happier every day just so I can see this every morning. There's nothing like a freaked out fire bug to get the day off to a good start. I chuckled to myself.

I was just in a happy mood to see them all. Maybe it was the amazing night I had last night with Noah. I guess he helped me release the build-up of emotions I was holding on to. It felt great to just let it go.

We got to chatting on a different conversational track than what I did last night. As great as it was, I didn't need my best friend's boyfriend and my ex-boyfriend finding out the juicy details. I heard Lissa through the bond.

_You have to tell me everything!_

-X-

The morning so far had passed uneventfully. Mia had come over to help work on spirit with us and Lissa had used that as a distraction to get me away for a few moments so she could get all the details of the night before. She told me my aura had lost a little darkness and there was a little silver shine. I was happy to hear that, and she was happy for me.

When we returned to the lounge Lissa told us that she and Adrian had heard rumours of spirit wielders distorting appearances and voices. Of course, they wanted to try it out, and so Mia and I were the test subjects. I'm all for Lissa experimenting with her powers but I was bored shitless. We had been working on this for twenty minutes to no avail.

Lissa was still so excited about mastering this because it would definitely come in handy, but Adrian and I were starting to get restless. I jumped up from the couch and headed to the kitchen to get myself a drink.

"Going to get me one, Little Dhampir?" Adrian asked as he moved behind me. His arms circled my waist, hugging me from behind. He didn't hold on for very long and stepped round me to get something from the fridge.

I loved spending time with Adrian and I really had missed him during the past two days. I found I could always relax around him. He flirted and always held me in a way that would have been inappropriate if I had a boyfriend, but seeing as I wasn't in a relationship and I liked it I wasn't going put a stop to it anytime soon.

"You know I have really missed you right?" I spoke softly as I leant against the counter and watched him.

"Yeah I do." He smiled and came to lean beside me.

"Wait, don't you miss me?" I looked worriedly at him.

"Yes, you know I miss every moment we don't get to spend with each other." There was a definite seriousness to his tone that I didn't like.

"You're corny, Ivashkov" I smiled despite myself and I went back to sipping my drink. Just content to be in his presence I pushed myself up to sit on the counter.

"So you had sex with Noah last night?"

_Nice Adrian, just casually bring it up_. I didn't want to have to speak to him about this. I speak to Liss about this sort of stuff. Not Adrian.

"We don't need to speak about this Adrian."

"Instead of coming to see me last night, you were doing it with him, Rose. I'm glad he's here to make you feel better but that's two nights in a row." He sounded upset and hurt. I didn't want to hurt him again. He's always been there for me.

"I didn't mean to, it just… happened. I was upset." I felt like I was a child being caught in preschool for stealing the last cookie and the teacher was asking me if I had done it. I felt like he was disappointed in me.

"You didn't think to come to me?"

"I was running and got lost in my thoughts, and Noah found me crying. It wasn't meant to happen, it just did okay? I needed some affection. After Rhonda decided to tell me some stuff about my future it made me go back and think of _that_ day. It was the worst day of my life. You shouldn't even be talking to me anymore but you are. I'm so sorry." The words tumbled out of my mouth and tears threatened to spill. I won't cry. I _won't_ cry.

Adrian must have seen the tears in my eyes or the sadness in my aura because he wrapped his arms around me.

"Whenever you need me or someone, I can give you whatever you need. I promise. There isn't anything I wouldn't do. I am also jealous Little Dhampir. You don't know how much I missed you last night."

"I'm sorry." I looked towards the ground. "Come dream walk with me tonight. Let's go somewhere nice and tomorrow, You. Me. Takeout in your apartment.

"I'd like that my Dhampir."

"Adrian are you doing that?" He looked at me confused. My throat was tingling and starting to burn. My eyes widened and I started coughing. I felt some darkness surge through the bond and in the lounge I could hear Mia coughing. I ran into the lounge to see Lissa clapping her hands in enjoyment.

"YES!" She jumped up from the couch. "Talk! Both of you! Now!"

Mia looked hesitant but she nodded.

"What do y- OMG! I sound like Rose!" Her eyes were wide with shock.

"Awes-"I began to say but my voice came out higher pitched. I covered my mouth in shock. "Shit! I sound like Mia!"

"Wow thanks Rose, How sweet of you." She laughed. So that what I sounded like. Huh.

"Congrats cousin! Now you will just have to teach me how to do it. How did you do it? Adrian's shocked look was replaced with determination as he sat down on the couch and I joined him.

We listened to Lissa explain how she just concentrated on the thought of our throats and how we would sound as each other. She felt the tingle of spirit and BAM we had each other's voices.

We sat there for half an hour watching Lissa bounce up and down with happiness as we waited for Christian and Eddie. I heard them come in and as soon as they reached the lounge Lissa was jumping with excitement.

"Hey, Babe. Hey everyone." Christian smiled as he came to sit by Lissa. Eddie moved to sit beside Mia.

"Okay so I'm really excited to show you this! Okay Mia and Rose, say hi to Christian and Eddie." She looked towards us expectantly.

-X-

The day had gone from 'amazing' to 'terrible'.

After the amusement of having Mia's voice I asked to have my voice back.

Lissa tried to return our voices back to normal and failed. She stuttered and was shocked that she couldn't figure out how to reverse it.

Mia was happy though. She didn't mind having my voice. She was excited and thought she would pick up some good looking guys tonight. I, on the other hand, happened to like my voice quite a bit, so having to walk around court with a high pitched, sweet voice was quite disturbing.

However, despite that mishap I'm really excited for the ball tonight. I always hated public events because I always felt so judged, but I have a good feeling about tonight.

This event also required a mask. I get to enjoy myself and let my hair down and no one will know it's me, especially with my new voice. I headed to the gym to have a quick workout session before I showered and headed for the hair salon.

I walked into the salon to find literally nobody here. Tara, a tall, stunning, brunette Moroi came out from the back. She had the longest legs I had ever seen. She also had a small curve to her. Something you don't often see with Moroi. Unless it's a baby bump I guess.

"Rose! I was waiting for you! Everyone came during the morning and I thought I would see you then."

"Oh I went to work out. Didn't want to over crowd you." I grinned as I took off my jacket. She ushered me towards a seat and got to work.

I was in the middle of a hair treatment, getting _the_ best head massage when I started think of the messages Rhonda gave me yesterday. Her last one was to wear my hair up. I decided that I would follow her advice and asked Tara if she could do that for me. I also asked if she could give me some bangs that framed my face. I watched as she snipped, curled and layered, and turned my waist length hair into a shoulder length hairstyle with framing bangs. I looked hot.

I will never admit this to anyone but I really do love court and how much I am pampered here. When I went back to St Vladimir's I knew that I would never be able to get my nails done or wear makeup, because being a guardian is rough. My hands have been rough and calloused but Lissa has made sure that every month my hands and feet get manicured and pedicured. A little extra added bonus to make me feel good. I'm not going to complain.

Next was makeup.

Lissa wanted to do my makeup. She says with the dress she got me that I had to get ready with her.

I stopped into the café to grab a chocolate milkshake when from across the lawn out front I saw this tall man. From the back he looked pretty good. He seemed to work out and look after his appearance, as he was well built and wearing some smoking clothes. Maybe this was Noah's partner, and if so Noah has a run for his money.

Mmm I could jus-

"Chocolate Milkshake!" Grrgh. I had just started to fantasize about this new man in court. I turned towards the attendant, grabbed my shake and said a quick thank you.

Walking out of the shop I looked towards where I saw him standing.

But he was nowhere to be seen.

-X-

**The Ball**

Lights moved around the room. An arrangement of different colours moving across the floor. Lissa had done a great job of turning this ball room into something magical. There were tables with white linen and white bows tied around the chairs all along the outer edge of the hall. Guardians were up against the walls watching and observing everyone and everything.

Tonight will be especially hard for the guardians considering everyone's identities are covered up by the masks, but I have no doubt that tonight will go off without a hitch. My beautiful green dress flowed around me as I walked down the stairs as gracefully as possible. My hair was grazing the tops of my shoulders, and my mask was annoying. I looked ahead to see find man looking at me. He didn't seem too much older than myself. He had short dark hair and a black pinstripe suit on. He watched me as I walked down the stairs and across the floor.

I didn't think I knew him. Nothing about him was familiar. He just seemed like an average, hot guy. Recognition dawned in me. _He_ was the guy from outside the café.

As I looked at him from the corner of my eye I caught his gaze, and smiled and winked.

I tried to move out of view his line of sight so I could look back at him. He was still standing there, watching me, and hadn't moved. Before I knew it I had run into something. _Good one Rose._

"Shit!" I looked up to meet jade green eyes. "Adrian! Why the hell did you go and bump into me?"

"_You_ ran into me. I was just standing here casually, as you perved on some guy in the middle of the room and he perved back. What can I say? I'm a bit of a perv." He smiled kindly towards me. I started to giggle and couldn't stop. I placed a hand on his arm and smiled. I looked back towards the mystery man, to find he'd moved.

He was good at that, just disappearing from sight as soon as I looked away. I turned back to Adrian. "So… do you know who he is?"

"Absolutely no idea. Sorry, little dhampir." I nodded and swayed with him to the music for a few minutes. Adrian was soon asked to dance by a girl in a purple dress and off he went. He looked like he was only mildly enjoying it.

I smiled, amused by the fact that he was obviously uncomfortable, yet too polite to say so.

I turned to walk away, and bumped into another chest. I slowly dragged my eyes up to meet his. I felt this pull towards him. I wanted to dance with him. I wanted to laugh with him.

The guy from the dance floor.

"Come with dance with me." His voice was breathless as he held out his hand.

I took it and didn't look back.

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><p>Bahahah i know im evil i only put the start of the ball. It needed to be like this... cause the next scene is going to get crazy!<p>

**Tell me... Who do you think this mysterious man who has captivated Rose's attention?**

**And what would you do if i told you I would kill one of the main characters off? Who do you think it will be?**

**Dimitri at court will be coming Very SOON! **

**Review =P**


	6. Festivities, Truth and First Love

**Chapter 6**

**I know its been long but my beta and myself have been very busy with schooling and getting ready for uni. **

**I wish my Beta the best of luck as she heads of to uni in the next week! My beta Nicia continuously out does herself again and again.. she amazes me. **

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><p>He pulled me out to the gardens. They were beautiful. The normally gorgeous royal gardens had been decorated to make them even more stunning - if that was possible. The hedges and the outsides of the water fountains had fairy lights in various colours strung around them. A canopy of black and white streamers hung above us with garlands of white chrysanthemums, lilacs and baby's breath that fell from them.<p>

This man, who I had never even met before walked me to the edge of the royal gardens to stand under the cover of the blossoming cherry trees. I didn't know what had come over me. I just felt inexplicably drawn to this man and simply stood there, looking up into his eyes. Despite his mask I could tell he was tired. There were dark circles under his eyes.

Unfortunately, I couldn't see much of his face.

His mask only allowed me to see his eyes and mouth. His eyes found mine and my breath hitched in my throat. Butterflies flew around my stomach like they were on drugs. The only other man who had given me butterflies like this was Dimitri.

My smile faltered and I looked towards the floor, wondering if it was too late to make a run for it. I felt his fingers trail down the side of my cheek, slowly guiding my chin up so I could look at him. Sparks lingered where he touched me and a shiver ran down my spine. Whether it was from pleasure at his touch, or not, I couldn't be sure.

"What's wrong beautiful?" He sounded like he had lost his voice.

"Have you lost your voice or am I just that breath taking?" The tension and nervous atmosphere disappeared as my cheekiness appeared.

"Both." He said, staring intently into my eyes. He smiled softly and I smiled back. It made my heart ache. When I was with Dimitri he had little smiles like those. The last genuine smile I had from him was the night in the cabin.

How things had changed.

"Dance with me?" I couldn't help but laugh. His voice was hilarious as he rasped out his words. "What's so funny?"

He looked at me like he loved hearing my laugh, not like I was some crazy person even though he knew I was laughing at him. That stab of disappointment hit me again. This crazy, sexy and mysterious guy loved Mia's voice… not mine.

"God damn it!" I muttered under my breath but he seemed to catch what I said.

"What's wrong?" Concern flashed through his eyes. They looked familiar but couldn't place them. They were just brown eyes - a lot of people had brown eyes.

"Firstly, I was laughing cause you sound hilarious with hardly any voice, sorry. Secondly, I'm sad because this isn't my real voice. A friend was playing around with some magic and now I'm walking around with someone else's, and you smile when I laugh and this isn't my real laugh." I gushed my words without taking a breath.

"That's okay. I'm hoping I'll get to see you after tonight. That way I can fall in love with your real voice." He smiled.

"Yeah, that's what you would like to think bucko!" I laughed and he laughed with me. He gently took my hand in his and lifted it to rest lightly on his shoulder. I placed my other hand in his. A new song started from the ball room and we started to move in time with the music.

_This is for the things you never know. _

_It's in the words you say that got me tearing at my soul. _

_And you come to me and I'm come into you. _

_And you're here tonight. Stay with me tonight._

"So will you tell me your name?" He leaned closer to whisper in my ear, the movement sending a little waft of his aftershave towards me. I shook my head against his. I loved the smell of him. _Intoxicating_.

"This is a masquerade ball, no one is meant to know who you are. That's why I love it so much." He looked at me like he was hopeful of something. Maybe he would be lucky enough to make me want to lose my mask tonight.

"You are gorgeous. Did you know that?"

"I like to think so." I smiled at him and he started humming the song.

_It's in the way your hair falls down. _

_With every breath you send me spinning round and round. _

_And these nights they always turn into days. _

_Stay with me tonight. It will be alright. _

_We'll be singing,_

I remembered the song as he spun me around. This song bought back plenty of unwelcome emotions.

But _this_ felt right.

Everything with him was right. I started to sing with the chorus. Something I never normally do.

"_Take me home. Take me again and again. Save me oooooooh (in some way). Just make me whole again."_

All I wanted was to feel whole again. No one had managed to do that for me yet. Noah was so close, but I couldn't help but want this guy I didn't even know, to be the one. I was consumed by the urge to have just _him_ make me… me.

_Now I'm waiting for you to run. _

_You always say you're in love._

_So why you saying that you're done. _

_You're just waiting for me to call out your name. _

_Don't you leave tonight. Don't leave tonight._

I'm hard to be with. I've been through a lot, and that meant that at times I'm too much to handle.

When he finds out I'm Rose Hathaway he is sure to walk away and never see me again. I was the pathetic girl who ran after a man who didn't want her. I embarrassed myself in front of everyone for him, and he still walked away because I was pathetic and not worth a thing.

_Cause you're tired of then burning out. _

_And the cross you bear doesn't fit with the crown.  
>And you'll never know just how far we have come. <em>

_But you'll be alright. Yeah you'll sing tonight. _

_You'll be singing._

I don't think I could handle falling for someone again. The hurt inside of me is too deeply imbedded, and it took me such a long time to even begin to get over it… if it happens again, I think I'd lose myself for good. But I'm not really _me_ right now. 'Just make me whole.' I silently wished. He spun me out and pulled me back into his chest.

_Take me home. Take me again and again. _

_Save me oooooooh (in some way). _

_Just make me whole again._

We slowly danced with the music. I stared up into his eyes as the next verse begun, trying to figure out what he was thinking. I began to sing again.

"_Now I'm waiting for you to give me a sign. That you'll be here with me in my darkest time, probably be here fighting with the morning light. But you know I'll be alright. You know we'll sing tonight. We'll be here singing Take me home. Take me again and again. Save me oooooooh (in some way. And just take me home again."_

I placed my head against his shoulder and sighed, my eyes drifting closed as I listened to the end notes of the tune.

"Rose? Is it you?" I looked up at him in confusion. The song had finished and a new one had started.

"How did you know? Who are you?" I was alarmed that this weird guy knew who I was. I lifted my hands to his mask as his reached up to mine. He slowly pulled mine off and his eyes widened. I pulled his off quickly.

It was my worst nightmare coming true. This couldn't be happening. NO!

"Dimitri?" My voice was questioning as my jaw dropped with shock. Tears sprung to my eyes. NO! This isn't meant to happen. This wasn't mean to be him. OMG! I hadn't realised… His hair! He stared at me with wide, worried eyes as he slowly reached for me. I swatted his hands out of my way. "Your hair? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" Before I realised what I was doing, I was running my hands through his short chopped hair. Once the realisation hit me I stepped back. "Wait. No. You can't- No. Why? Just- I-"

I turned tail and ran, which is surprisingly hard to do in a formal dress and heels. I felt my hair come loose of its ties, adding extra weight to slow me down. He was after me in a second, I could hear him calling my name.

"ROSE! WAIT! I'M SORRY, PLEASE STOP!" I couldn't. I kept running till I felt his hands circle my waist.

"LET GO!" I screamed at him. I screamed and yelled as I tried to squirm from his embrace. He just held me, whispering a Russian song to try and comfort me, no doubt.

No. he wasn't allowed to do this. He didn't get to hold me. I tried to fight back and wriggle out of his grasp, but he used his strength to pull me to the floor.

I saw Lissa run out form the hall and many of its other occupants followed her, eager for the chance to get some fresh gossip.

Adrian was stood there, shock in his eyes. He was distressed, but I wasn't sure why. Lissa was looking at me with regret.

Some of the guardians who were on duty came forwards to force Dimitri to let go of me. Reluctantly, he let me go and stood up.

They were about to grab Dimitri when I screamed at them to stop. There was something I needed to do first. And surprisingly, they obeyed. Looking around I had the audience of the entire ball. I didn't care. Dimitri was going to get the bitching out he deserved, and he could be embarrassed in front of the entire court this time around. I didn't care about me - it happened once it can happen again.

"How dare you come back you ASS FACE! Do you know how much you put me through? Did you think this would be funny? A joke?"

"What, no. I didn't know it was you and then it clicked."

"Shut. It. Why did you even come back to Court? You _knew_ I was here. I thought you would be a decent enough guy to stay away once you left. We went through the constant struggle of being together, and then the fact you were turned. I came after you! I looked for you as a Strigoi, and tried to make your death honourable. I kept _my_ promise. Then, I found the people who could change you back! And _I_ made it possible." I poked a finger into my chest to emphasise my point. "_I_ was the one who learnt how to save you, and _you_ of all people threw everything we ever shared back in my face. I never expected you to hurt anybody like you did me."

"I came back because I had too. I thought I could earn your forgiveness. You and I shared a connection out there. Please let me make it up to you. _Please,_ Roza."

"Wow. Earn my forgiveness. You are full of jokes, _Comrade_! Don't call me Roza. You will never know what it's like to call me Roza again."

"Rose, please… you don't know how much I had to do to become _me_ again. I was lost, and thought you could never forgive me for what I did to you when I was a Strigoi! What I did is unforgivable, and I didn't realise you just wanted to love me. I never stopped loving you I swear! Rose please, hear me out."

"If you loved me you would have given me the time of day. You would have talked to me. Instead, you threw me away and told me you didn't love me anymore. You're a nasty piece of work Belikov, I hope you're fucking happy!" I threw my hands up in the air and turned to storm out, only to realise that my path was blocked by many Moroi and Dhampirs.

Shit.

"My mum and Viki are coming to see you, I wanted them to come see you."

_Oh really, is that so? _

That hurt me a lot. Ever since I left Russia and made it back to St Vladimir's I had always tried to keep in touch with Olena Belikov… but for some reason my calls where not taken once Dimitri had left court.

I turned back sharply.

"I don't want to see them!" He looked as if I had slapped him in the face. "Ever since you left every time I called I had the phone hung up on me! Every letter I had sent was opened then returned with a note on the back saying 'not to send any letters to our family anymore!' So I'm sorry if you think I want to see a family I thought loved me and then turned their back on me!" Dimitri's expression was ashamed and he looked down on the ground.

I was crying. They were my family. That family meant the world to me. I felt like I belonged and it was taken away without an explanation. Yet another hurt I had to deal with.

"I'm sorry. I told them not to have any sort of contact with you anymore. I thought I needed to heal without you, and because of that I restricted my family from you. They love you and made a fuss, but did it because I begged them to. It's been so hard for them." He had tears in his eyes. But I will not let his tears bring me to my knees and make me cave and forgive him. I needed to be tough.

I looked at him in disgust despite the tears flowing from my eyes.

"You took away everything I had. You took away my heart and broke it into pieces. You took away my family! The only family I've had! The only mother I've had who made me breakfast. My sister Viki and my grandmother! You! You ruined everything! Not content with breaking my heart, you had to break my soul and the little happiness I had left after everything that happened. You took me and broke me into pieces, and you steal my family and you just make me a hollow piece of shit compared to what I used to be! So screw you back to the depths of the dead!"

I punched him hard in the face. I felt a familiar crack of nose breaking. I know I was harsh, but he took everything from me and thought I would forgive him.

"What's going on? Rose?" I heard as Noah made his way out from the crowd to stand beside Lissa and Adrian. I took one look at him, as he looked behind me to look at Dimitri. Shock and confusion covered his face while recognition flared in my mind as the pieces all clicked together; Dimitri was Noah's new guarding partner.

Noah's eyes flickered back to my face, and once he saw my tears he started to come forward. He looked back to Dimitri and his bleeding nose, and knew something had happened between us. I put a hand out to say not to come near me.

I looked at Adrian. I needed an out and I wanted out with him.

I wanted Noah too. He always knew what to do with me when I had a Dimitri problem, but seeing as he didn't know that his partner was the one who hurt me a year ago, I would leave him here to ask Dimitri the questions that were burning in his eyes.

I walked up to Adrian and he took my hand in his. I touched Noah's arm and he leaned down to place a kiss on my forehead. My eyes flickered over to Dimitri, to see him wince at Noah's action. As we slowly walked away from the scene I had left behind I turned to look at Dimitri once again.

"Good fucking job, _Comrade_! You've really fucked everything up this time!"

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><p><strong>Song: Sing by Unwritten Law<strong>

**Flower Meanings: Baby's Breath - Festivity, Lilac - First Love, White Chrysanthemum - Truth.**

**Review to help Rose and her truama of seeing Dimitri again!**


	7. Author Note: Im sorry

I'm so sorry to all of my readers!

A few months ago I mentioned that my senior exams were coming and I would be a bit slow writing…. Well…..

Everything fell to crap pretty much after that.

I want to say I'm so sorry that I haven't been on to update, I'm also sorry to the people I told I would be writing again very soon.

A lot of personal things happened after my senior exams that threw me around a lot and I lost the inspiration to write. It was like if I continued writing in my mind frame.. Dimitri and Noah would both be dead. Which is not how the story is meant to go. No one wants to see that happen. Then my laptops wifi connection decided to die.

After that I came on and read some reviews and talked to some amazing people from the limited time I had on my mother's laptop and these people gave me inspiration to write… until my cat dive-bombed my laptop and smashed the screen up and I lost the next few chapters of the story!

I WAS DESTRAUGHT! I cried… a lot.

I had never wanted to go so long without writing as it makes me happy and I never wanted to make the people who love the story wait.

But I have good news! I have been working my bottom of over Christmas and I am getting a new laptop next Wednesday! I can't wait to write again… and hopefully I haven't lost too many people who followed the story along…

Fingers crossed!

Love Krys


	8. Going Backwards maybe Just Crazy

**Chapter 7**

**Hey Guys... Sorry for the long break.. but i am back. Sorry it took longer than planed by the time I got over my Rustiness my Beta has dropped of the planet the past week so im giving this too you raw and unedited by Nicia's Amazing Standards! 0_0 SO basically it might be crap hahaha**

**I hope you like this chapter... This one is a little bit of a filler but the chapters to come are going to go wild =) **

**Please review so I don't feel bad for giving you unedited and also I need validation from others =P **

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><p>2 weeks later.<p>

If only life could be simple. If only life could be slightly more predictable. I for one did not foresee the events that would in turn take me 373 steps back. People always say that when such crazy, stupid and hurtful things happen that they will be able to laugh about it in the future. Maybe ten years down the track I could possibly laugh about it. I will remember how stupid and idiotic I was, how hopelessly I would fight for anyone who meant anything to me. Unfortunately now my resilience and drive has been whacked off balance. For everyone else I'm sure they are laughing about it right now. Who cares about talking behind my back when you can do it right in front of me?

Obviously no one, because I was the talk of court again.

-v-

When you spend so much time thinking it can really start to mess with your head. Your worries, needs, wants and fears expose themselves to you in a way you never even imagined until you started to think. I am dealing with my latest worries, fears, wants and needs and boy do they take up a lot of space in my head. And maybe if I hadn't isolated myself in the first place I wouldn't be thinking so much.

Although when your best friend decides to still be good buddies with the guy who tore out your heart and invite him back into your home I guess that's reason enough to be insanely hurt. Especially if they can't even warn you.

Lies. Why can't anyone just tell me the truth? It would have saved a lot of trouble over time. It would save a lot of hurt and mistrust. But when you've been brought up with lies and slyness it's not hard to pick up a little yourself. But I really truly thought that the people who cared about me, who were family in a sense, would never hurt me.

It only made it worse when they tried their hardest to win you back… but all you want is to be alone.

The new diner that I had chosen was well known among the common class of court, the workers, the teenagers and those who just lived here. It was quiet most of the day but picked up at lunch and after school was out. It was a great place to just sit and think. They didn't stare at me which is a nice change to the first ten food places I had tried. At first I thought they didn't know what happened until some teenagers wanted to know what breaking a nose felt like. Funny enough it was my second time I had, and I let them know that. I have a reputation and I might as well let it be known to the next generation.

This could be the perfect new place to avoid contact. The doorbell ran. Looking up to see who had just entered the diner. The back booth was the best. I could see who came in and they couldn't see me. It was just some kid. School must be out.

For crying out loud! Another milkshake totally wasted on my thoughts. I bet everyone closer to royalty would be pleased to know how truly unsatisfying my chocolate milkshake was. Moving towards the counter to order, out of the corner of my eye I noticed the kid who just walked in look at me, pull out his phone snap and photo and turn to walk away.

Now why would some punk ass kid be taking a photo of me? _Rude!_

"Oi You!" I walked up to him. He turned to look at me with stunned eyes. "Yeah Im talking to you! Who do you think you are taking photos of people without asking? Huh?"

His eyes widened in shock and tried to run out the door but not before I grabbed the back of his shirt.

"Who do you work for and why do they want my photo?" I said between gritted teeth.

"I uh... I didn't mean too. Someone was looking for you and asked me to find you… I wasn't sure what you looked like… so I took a photo and sent it to them… I- I- I'm sorry. Please let me go." He was scared of me but didn't know who I was? And who wanted to find me? Not to mention how incredibly stupid it would be for him to find someone for somebody he doesn't know. Letting go of his shirt I push him away from me.

I lower my voice. "Listen here kid. You really shouldn't be doing things for people you don't know around here. It may be court but it can still be very dangerous alright, especially people looking for me. Okay?" He nodded.

"Ah little damphir it's nice to see you met my assistant today. Please don't hurt him."

The kid ran off as I turned to face Adrian, Which was silly because I was still talking to him if he only bothered me with what I want to hear.

"You could have just called you know. You want anything?" I indicated to the counter.

"I'm good thanks. Back booth?" He raised his eyebrows in a questioning manner. I gave my head a slight nod and leant against the counter to order a new milkshake and returned my seat in the back booth.

"You got those files I asked for?" I whispered.

"I do but I'm not going to give them to you."

"You're a brave man Ivashkov I would hate to see you get hurt." I frowned at him. If he didn't give me those files I was going to lose it.

"It's amazing how you channel Abe like that. Like father like daughter." He smiled sheepishly at me.

"Adrian, I am so not in the mood! Come on!"

"I won give them to you until you tell me how you are. You have avoided it for the past two weeks and its time okay. Please." He placed his hands out on the table and grabbed mine and held them.

I had been fine for two weeks. Not a tear shed, I made a promise not to cry over Dimitri again. But the kindness that radiated from Adrian's eyes made me want to just let everything out. Adrian knew me inside and out and he knew I wasn't okay. He had seen the inner me the part no guardian wants anyone to see. I guess I picked something up from Dimitri.

"You know exactly how I feel. No I'm not okay and I don't see how anyone would be in this situation but you have to believe I will be fine and I'm moving on." Pulling my hands from Adrian's and placing them in my lap. He believed me I could tell but he wasn't finished. Great.

"What about Lissa? Are you going to go back to work anytime soon?"

"What about her? I thought she was better than that. I thought she would have some common courtesy about it all. She is in the wrong and I don't want to be around her simple. Anyway I am working, just from home. I've been offered a job somewhere and I am thinking about taking it. But don't tell anyone I told you."

"You've been offered a job? You're going to take it? Not to burst a Bubble or anything Rose but what about everyone here? What about me?" Concern was etched into all his features; like this was the news he was dreading and hoping he didn't hear from me today.

"I'd take you with me." It was simple if I left I would ask him to come with me.

"Have you spoken to Noah yet?" He was changing the subject. I could see the shift in his eyes and the slight movement in his seat. He so didn't want to hear that I was thinking about leaving. And I didn't want to hear about Noah. So I just stared at him.

"He knows about you and Belikov. And from what I've been told he is refusing to work with him. There's a lot of tension between them. Trust me when I say he doesn't think badly of you."

"I just never thought they would meet. Have a relationship. This is bad and you know it. I know it's bad between us at the moment but I will talk to him. Soon, I promise." I meant it too. I really did need to speak to Noah. I'm not sure how he felt about it all. I knew what went down after I left the ball. Mia told me. Noah asked Dimitri what the hell it was all about.

Dimitri explained the fight which then in turn caused Noah to hit him in the face again. While Dimitri apparently took it like when I hit him he then demanded to know Noahs relationship with me and well Noah told him how he picked up the pieces and he was now the man in my life.

While normally it would be cool to have two men fight over you, similar to a room full of chocolate in my desires this was definitely not how I wanted it to go down. In the end I broke a friendship for Noah and potentially the Job he held.

"What are you going to do about Olena and Viktoria?" He looked mildly interested about the topic but I knew he was asking so he was prepared.

"Huh? Oh um, Nothing. I don't have anything to say to them. I don't have anything to do with them. Not my problem." They made the decision to walk out on me when I needed them they just can't walk back into my life either. It doesn't just work that way. What is it with the Russians?

"You know they are going to try to talk to you."

"If I can avoid her royal highness I can avoid two Russians. "

"True I guess." He shrugged it off; it wasn't something he was overly concerned about. Looking down I noticed I had been sucking on a straw, the straw that lead to my now empty chocolate milkshake.

"You have really got to stop interrupting my daily plans Ivashkov! Another chocolate milkshake that wasn't thoroughly enjoyed!" huffing about like a child he laughed.

"There's my Rose, the tantrum throwing one." He smiled at me. I was tempted to pull out my middle finger but didn't.

"Screw You. So those files can I have them?" I smiled sweetly at him. He pulled them out from his coat and slid them across the table. He seemed kind of bad ass when he did that. It totally added to the suspiciousness of it all, but I was trying to keep this low profile.

Adrian had been sneaking into places of interest. The court house, the guardian headquarters and grabbing any files he could get a hold on that matched my list and descriptions. While in the past I probably could have walked in and taken them, not actually working by Lissa's side had some drawbacks.

Adrian wasn't out of place in court so he could easily use his compulsion to get what I need and get out without being suspicious. And from experience we know the records room has no cameras and Mikhail from the guardian headquarters was on my team and allowed Adrian in to retrieve the files that Mikhail had already taken from the records room.

"Thanks Adrian I really appreciate it."

"You going to tell me what you are up too." Here was the concern again. He had cut back on his drinking and smoking. He was actually showing genuine emotions most of the time now.

"I think I liked it better when you didn't talk so much. All you need to know is that I don't think something is quite right."

"You're a smart cookie, whatever it is I hope you can sort it out because from your elevated interest in this I'm not too sure I want whatever is happening to go any further."

"Hey." I grabbed his coat as he was about to leave. "Do you think you and your drunken ass can clog up my apartment again? Come move in with me?" I was hopeful that he would say yes. Please say yes.

"I'll be there when you get home with all my bottles of alcohol so we can drown both our worries away little damphir.

-v-

Sitting in the familiar waiting room I had a sense of dread wash over me. The smell of incense filled the air. I didn't want a reading today, I didn't want to know in riddle what she had for me I just wanted to tell her thanks for the great warning.

I thought her riddles could be figured out but her last one just went over my head. Why can't you just say 'hey, this is going to happen. I hope this helps in your future planning.' But I guess she loves the fun and games of it all.

The door opened and out walked Dimitri. Great maybe it will be a little hard to avoid two Russians when they come to town especially if I can't avoid one.

Rhonda followed behind him. "Rose how good to see you back again!" she turned to Dimitri "I would like it if you would come back soon."

"What so you can tell him that what he treasures in life he has back and it's made him into an ass. I think he already knows the first part but I'm sure you can spend a few weeks drilling into him how much of a shitty person he has become."

I stormed into the room as Rhonda followed behind me. "He is extremely remorseful what he put you through."

"Oh don't you even bother siding with him you old lady." She just laughed which I guess is just in her nature. Fun and games.

"Look I just wanted to tell you that you and your crappy fortune telling sucks! Next time you want to lay the Dimitri bomb on me just tell me! You could have told me but no you opted for what everyone else did and just be an ass and not tell me!"

"Rose"

"No. No. No more predictions, I had enough of your last one. That turned out crap."

"You're going through a rough time now."

"Thank you captain obvious. If you didn't already know, it's been a tough life. It won't get better I know. Thanks." I turned to leave out the door. I had had enough of riddles and lies. I just wanted normal for once. The she spoke and I stopped to listen.

"The last prediction wasn't just Dimitri. There is more. All I can tell you is to be strong." I didn't look back and just kept walking.

It's easy to say 'be strong' but hard to do when you are already so broken.

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><p>Noah.<p>

Life had taken a spiral out of control. One moment I'm happy and the next everything that was going so right was now going so wrong. I hadn't done anything but yet here I am sitting alone.

This wasn't my fault it was his.

I can't believe that all this time it was Dimitri that did this to Rose. From what I had come to learn of him he didn't seem he could be the sort. He seemed caring enough especially around his family. I feel stupid for not have realising. It was all there, every little titbit of information I managed to collect about him seemed to match. He hadn't changed.

Realizing this now really sucked. If I had known it was him I would never said yes to working with him. The people in Russia called him the cursed one. They told me I wasn't safe around him but brushed it off a silly superstitions. In a way they are true brought back to life after being Strigoi could earn you that sort of reputation.

Every time I see him I want to snap. Just want cause him the same pain he caused Rose. Let him know the damage he did. I could do that but I know it would hurt Rose to do so. That's why I think Adrian and I should have some words with him.

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><p>Let me know if you enjoyed it... Pleaasssseee Review =)<p>

Love Krysxx


	9. I Thought I Was Stronger

**I Thought I Was Stronger**

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><p><strong>Sorry Guys! I havn't updated in foreverrrrrrrr but heres the new chapter. Inspiration had found me and words keep tumbling from my head.<strong>

**Read and review. It makes my inspiration flow more freely =D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own VA. If I did i wouldn't be here would I?**

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><p>Rose POV<p>

While having Adrian move his… well I would say shit into my apartment was somewhat a pain in my ass I was pretty pleased that I had managed to actually get him to do it. When he said yes to me in the diner a week ago I thought he was joking it didn't help he thought I was joking when I asked him to move in.

I spent a good day sitting at his feet beside his couch annoying the shit out of him. He caved and I danced around his apartment, although when I think about it there's really not much he wouldn't do when I ask.

Now a million questions are plaguing my mind. Is it really fair that I depend on him this much? Is it okay to ask him to do all these things for me? Am I constantly playing his emotions by doing so?

Surprisingly his furniture really works well with mine and who knew Adrian had a bone of creativity in him when he re arranged everything. Anyway, unrelated tangent. Adrian…

Its just so hard for me now too not depend on someone and its frustrating. Why do I have to be such a pain in the ass? How did I let myself get this way.

I am Rose fucking Hathaway and I kick fucking ass. I am not afraid of the evil living dead but I am afraid of a Russian Damphir? What the fuck is wrong with me. I need to grow some balls. Hell I even staked the son of a dick when he was one of the evil living dead and now I am more afraid of what he will do to my heart and head rather than life or death.

Shit. I will not let hot guys who act like dicks back in my life and I will show them no mercy. I AM STRONG and I AM AWESOME. I need to kick some ass.

"Hey Little D!"

"Huh…what Adrian?" I obviously had gone so far in thought I had been ignoring Adrian.

"Well it was the fourth time I have yelled out to you now. So naturally I come down to find you staring at the wall. I was sure that in the short time I was upstairs planning to steal your room you caught severe brain damage. I mean who looks at a wall for that long."

"Well for one. My room stays mine and HEY! You can't catch brain damage."

Adrian turned to me with a smile someone might give if they were being sympathetic.

"Well you have hit your head how many times now? To be honest I'm surprised you don't have brain damage yet." He said as if it was a matter of fact.

Picking up a book from the coffee table I threw it at the back of his head.

"Ugh" he grunted in pain.

"Well that's what you get. And if I find your shit all over the floor again you will have brain damage." I smiled sweetly.

Downside of having the crazy ass in my apartment was. He didn't know what a bin was.

Collapsing into an armrest I turned towards my best friend. That's funny isn't it, that I consider Adrian my best friend now. That I only turn to him. How my mind had decided for me that Lissa doesn't hold a superior place in my mentality now.

A wave of sadness rushed over me. But what's done is done and right now I don't have a bone in my body that wants to forgive and move on.

"Hey Adrian can you be a doll and go get me a burger and fries?" Putting on my best smile as he turned to look at me. He smiled back. The smile lighting up his face. And that's when he laughed.

"No!" he turned back to the box he was unpacking.

"Please, I am starving and I'm working on these files and I have to call Kirova and I just have a lot to do and I really don't feel like going out today."

"What did your last slave die off?"

"Not enough hard work so you better get going" Laughing to myself. " I am so funny, I make myself laugh. But seriously I'm starved."

He turned around and pulled me the finger.

"That's lovely Adrian. You are one classy gentlemen"

"Wait go back a bit. Did you say Kirova? Why are you calling her?" He came to sit beside me.

"Ill make a deal with you. If you go and get me food I will tell you everything."

"Is this because of Dimitri's kin?"

"What the hell. Dimitri's Kin? You mean his mother and sister? Where did you get kin from. Never mind, don't answer that."

The reason I didn't want to go out today and well the next two weeks was because Olena and Viktoria arrived last night and I didn't want to see them. Who throws out letters from a girl you call you daughter? My time with Olena and Viktoria were some of the best times. I got to experience Dimitri's home and life and family. They helped me regain myself in so many ways. And they threw that away. It kind of sounds like a soppy break up but when you don't have a family and you suddenly get one, there's no way you can go back from it.

"Yes okay. Because they are here." Adrian studied my face for a while.

"Okay. I will be back soon."

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><p>Dimitri POV<p>

"Alright I'm going to only say this once. Do not go and see Rose." My mother looked at me in horror. My mother and sister had just arrived and were placing their bags down in their rooms. I knew it was going to be hard to tell them that Rose didn't want anything to do with them especially as I had ruined it so magnificently.

Rose couldn't forgive me for what I had done to her. And I don't have a leg to stand on. While I thought that coming back with a refreshed head and a beating from my grandmother I would be able to show her that I was sorry I was severely wrong.

I came back to her angrier than ever, not just with me but with Lissa too. Closer to Adrian than she had ever been and found that not only did she have a past relationship with my new partner but was with him again when I got back. And the whole time I had been with Noah he kept talking about this horrible guy, which I now realize, is me.

I don't know even how I'm supposed to face her anymore. What will happen between us? I know that I still love her and I always have but now having snapped out of it, my feelings are stronger and more potent than ever.

"What do you mean we can't see Rose!" Now Viki was angry, just as I knew she would be.

"Mum, Viki, You have to respect Roses wishes. I'm sorry." This was it. The part they realized that Rose didn't want to see them because of another thing that I made them do.

"Thanks Dimitri. Came all the way here for nothing. You're a great brother there. Go and screw everyone up!" She yelled in my face and I deserved it.

"Viktoria! Don't you dare! You know your brother was having a hard time. We will still go to apologize. And if she doesn't want us then she can turn us away and we have to try to accept that."

Mum had started to cry. Look what I had done. Rose was right. I am still a monster.

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><p>Rose POV<p>

"Oh yes, I would really enjoy that. Haha no no. Not as wild as I used to be. Of course though, it would be great. I mean I wouldn't have gotten that far if it was for having one myself. No it would be a great opportunity. Hahaha Yes yes. "

_Knock knock_

"Oh well someone is at that door. I will see you when the school starts up again."

Sliding of the couch and putting down my phone I walked to the door. Which is odd because Adrian just normally lets himself right on in. Throwing the door open. "Adrian you don't have to knock!"

"Olena?" No. The woman who was a mother to me more than anyone in my entire life was standing at my door with a loaf of my favourite food. Black bread. I could smell its warmth. I had been yearning for it ever since I had gotten back. But I didn't have a mother to make it for me or even send me the recipe.

Here she was with Viktoria standing on my doorstep. Viki and grown so much and was more beautiful than the last time I saw her, she had grown up so beautifully just like her brother. And that snapped me back to reality. The fact they had abandoned me. I couldn't hold it back while I just stood there in shock the tears just started running down my face.

What happened strong and awesome Rose? Flushed down the toilet obviously. Along with my kick ass attitude and my heart of steel. He knew my weak spot. I can't have a weak spot! People who are weak Crack! People who are weak loose the battle! And I will not let him win. He will not do this to me!

I felt a hand on my shoulder. Obviously trying to comfort me. She smiled at me. Obviously mistaking my hurt and inner turmoil as happiness to see her. I shrugged and her hand fell from my shoulder. She went to place it their again. But I flinched and she let it fall to her side. Viktoria want to grab my hand and I stepped back.

"Don't come near me. Don't touch me." I croaked out. They both took a step back. They were saying something but I wasn't listening. All I could here was. _No, don't, can't be real. I am strong._

I saw Adrian appear and watched him assess what was going on before I grabbed on to him. "Make them leave." I whispered but when I turned and saw their shocked faces I knew they had heard. I felt him carry me towards the couch and placed me down, placed a blanket around me and walked away. I was safe.

"I think you should go now. Im sorry this has happened. Please tell him that bringing you doesn't help her out. She doesn't need any more reason to lose herself again. I haven't spent the last year trying to bring her back without it being messed up by the people who put her here in the first place. I'm sorry its harsh but she deserves someone to be there and be harsh for her."

"I am so sorry. I never expected." Her voice hitched in her throat. "We will go. Please take this. It's her favourite, and… tell her we love her."

The door slammed and I could see again. The danger was gone. All I could think of was how I couldn't really think at all. How my mind and shut down and refused to help me in the situation. It all went so fast. They were here. I saw them and then I couldn't move.

I was not strong. This was another reminder of how broken I really was.


	10. Maybe It's Time To Move On?

**Maybe its time to move on?**

Disclaimer:

Dimitri: Krys, Marry me?

Krys: Am i in heaven?

Dimitri: No just in VA the book

Krys: Yep Heaven

Dimitri: To bad you don't own it

Krys: Gah! That Mead woman has it all. You and your zen life lessons Dimitri!

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><p>I woke every morning this week to the amazing smell of black bread outside my door. The aroma filled the apartment. Needless to say that I was definitely living off of this amazing bread that I had first come accustomed to while I was in Russia.<p>

"I have been seriously deprived Adrian!" I said to Adrian while I stuffed my mouth with more bread. I can't believe I went so long without it. "Olena knew the way to my heart. She's filled it with bread and it has become increasingly doughy."

"You haven't gone outside this apartment all week and all you have done is eat bread. I hate to tell you this but you're fat!"

"oo ake at ack!" I tried to get out as I hurled bread at his head.

"What was that fatty? I can't understand you with all that food in your mouth! You're a feisty one aren't you!" He stood there taunting me occasionally come close to pinch my belly.

"Are you going to throw a chicken leg at me next. Maybe a donut too?" I had finished my mouthful and tackled him.

I straddled his chest and pinned down his arms. "You take it back Adrian! Take it back now!"

"Cant breathe" he coughed out at me "Fatty on top of me!"

"Oh you want a fatty? Ill give you a fatty!" I yelled as I grabbed the new loaf of bread of the counter. I pulled a large chunk of the loaf and put it to his mouth.

"Open up Adrian!" he just shook his head. He wants to call me a fatty, then he can be one too and I don't care if I have to force feed him the bread.

Grabbing his nose so he couldn't breathe I waited for him to open his mouth so I could shove it.

_Knock Knock_

"Who is it?" As I turned to the door I swiveled back round to see Adrian open his mouth and I shoved it in.

"HA! I WIN!"

"Its Christian."

"Come on in, its open." I leaned close to Adrian's face smoshing his lips and cheeks together with my hand. "Eat and enjoy it!"

"Rose what are you doing to him?" I swiveled at the sound of that high pitched but methodical voice. Lissa.

"What the hell are you doing in my apartment?" I really wanted to know why she felt she was welcome to come in.

"I ah…"

"You ah… what? You thought it would be completely acceptable to rock up and come on in when you're not welcome. Wow you still haven't realized boundaries have you!"

"I'm sorry. Christian lets go." I got up off Adrian. I was so pissed how dare she come in here and then just leave. As she turned to go I ran over to the door and closed it before she reached it. She looked up and smiled at me.

She obviously felt that keeping her in was a good sign.

"Now listen here your highness. I don't care who you are or what right you think you have. Don't just think you can walk out now. There has been a lot that I haven't said to you!"

I was doing the whole pointy thing with my hand. Every time I pointed it she would flinch.

"Rose." Adrian pleaded. "You're scaring her."

"Oh that's funny! See I would never hurt you. Want to know why because I am a good friend. But you? Oh no. That's where we differ. You wouldn't care who you hurt and who cares what you did right? Poor innocent Lissa wouldn't hurt a fly but underneath it all so capable of hurting the ones who care about her most. You disgust me Vasalissa Dragomir!"

I walked towards her. "Thank you for coming today. You made me realize how much I don't want to be here. I quit. I have other crappy people to take care of today. Lastly you might want to tighten up security. I am done."

"I leave in 3 days." I walked towards the door and looked back. Adrian was still on the floor with his mouth full of bread and his eyes wide. Christian was shocked and Lissa was crying.

I was so sick of everyone. They only thought about themselves. For all I care they can all go shit a brick. I had spent the past month or so going over all the files. Catching all the people who shouldn't have been here to protect her.

But one thing was simple to me now. After all the mess and tears and the tantrums and the breakdowns. From the Vampires to the Damphir's I was done with court.

I walked out that door slamming it behind me.

**I. Come. First.**

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><p>The first thing I did when I left my building was to run. I didn't know where I was going or what I was going to do but I was going to run. I knew that when I got there I would have faith in what I was doing. I would know.<p>

Before I knew it I was knocking on a door.

I wasn't sure what door this was I just knew I was meant to be here. I stood waiting. I was too impatient for my own good before I started knocking again.

"Open the god damned door!"

"Roza?" Oh shit. Of course. The holiest of sounds had reached my ears. The sight of his deep brown eyes had my heart racing. Haunted and pained but that was always how they were and he was wearing his duster. He still had it. Damn him to hell.

"You!" I pointed at him

"Me?" he pointed at himself.

"Yes you!"

"What about me?"

"Arghh just YOU!" I pushed my hair out of my face and looked back up at him. I couldn't keep still. "Can I come in?"

"Yes Roza."

"Don't call me that." His face fell and I stormed inside taking a look. I saw a figure move down the hallway. It was Olena. I couldn't help but pace back in forth.

"Olena, thank you for the bread. It was amazing like usual." She smiled and looked up at me with her eyes shining. It was going to pain me for doing this. Dimitri looked at her mother with anger.

"I told you to let her be." He growled but she had just glared back. Viktoria had slid into the room and she was watching us. I saw her mouth my name and I couldn't look at her.

"Shut it. You've done enough." I really had a thing for pointing today. I saw him flinch at my words.

"Olena. What you did hurt me. You ripped your love and support away from me. You might not be my mum by blood but you were my mum. You decided I didn't deserve the title of daughter anymore. That runs deep. I don't know what it is with your son but he took most of my loved ones away from me. And you followed."

Swiveling towards Victoria. "Viktoria. I treated you like a sister and even though when I left you and you were angry all I did was protect you but I didn't expect you to hope of the loving Rose train either."

I looked between them and saw the sadness in their eyes. I turned between then and pulled them close to me before enveloping them in a hug. I still loved them and I couldn't help it. I cannot be angry with them.

"But I still love you and we will have to catch up before I leave okay?"

"You're leaving?" Lifting my head up and out of Olena and Viktoria's embrace I turned to look at the man that I loved. No… love. His deep eyes bore right into me grasping for an answer and trying to hold on to me. The one part of his body that no matter how much he tried to hide something I could always look into and it gave him away.

I couldn't help but get stuck in these deep gooey balls of brown. My heart stuttered and I was unsure I was thinking right when I made the decision to not think. Oh well there you go Rose. That was smart wasn't it?

I pulled away from away from Olena and moved in front of him, my eyes never leaving his. The pain hit. Why did he have to be so stubborn? Why did he have to prove a point? Why did I? Why couldn't our love withstand a little salvation?

Why did he have to leave me when I had only just gotten him back? We were always doomed I guess. Forced to fight for everything to never succeed.

His beautiful hair! I broke eye contact to look at the luscious locks that should have been falling out of its tie. Looking back into his eyes my hand lifted and I was beyond going back now. Screw you self-control. I felt my breath stop and his breath hitch in his throat as I slowly pushed back the small piece of hair from his forehead. His hands lifted as to hold me and I stepped back and sighed.

"Comrade. You're hair?" I shook my head from side to side. His eyes lit up as he smiled.

"It was getting long. All of the guardians have it short. I didn't want to cut it."

"Should have just worn it up." He chuckled and I couldn't help but laugh thinking about the time I had complained to him about my hair being too long.

"We need to talk and it's important. Saturday okay, the day before I leave. Ill explain it then."

It haunted me to think the last thing that I will be saying to him on Saturday will be goodbye and just when I got him back.

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><p><strong>Sorry i know it was shorter than my others but hey you got a Dimitri and Rose moment that wasn't all hate =D<strong>

**And let me know if you want more D and R love!**

**Hope you liked it! Let me know**

**I might update a little quicker if i got some reviews? =P**


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